Houston, we have a problem

ok, allora, so, . . .damn it! I have now been home for almost 2 weeks. That's plenty of time to readjust from 2 months away. Or is it? I haven't. What is the problem! I really did miss my friends and family; it has been wonderful to see them all again. I went to my parents beach house for 6 days and tried to put things into perspective; it didn't work. Every day, I look at the cheap bracelet around my wrist that says "Trastevere" and seriously wish to be walking, or tripping after my second liter of vino, on those cobble stoned streets. I even miss hearing the delinquents piss and barf outside my window at 5:30 in the morning. Things here have lost their edge; I can't find bright and shiny anymore. I miss working to understand conversations around me; being able to eavesdrop so easily irritates me. I still think simple phrases in Italian and remind myself not to say them out loud; it seems pretentious. I feel myself becoming very torn about my future. Unless it has been experienced, I have a difficult time explaining what it is about that place that speaks to me. I know that some of the feelings are because its "new" and not just plain old life. But that doesn't account for all of what I feel about Italy. There is a presence in the moment that captures my attention and makes me appreciate now. In Italy, tomorrow might not happen; it is today that matters. "Stories" are written because they are available and make up the chapters of our lives. As with good food and wine, relationships with people are to be savored and enjoyed for the time they are available. People spend hours sitting and chatting instead of racing around to appointments. Games between people are not the norm; but the exception. Simplicity reigns in most aspects of life; there is real passion in that way of living. I miss it. Guess that case of vino I brought home will have to carry me through. . . at least for 2 days!!

photo taken by Beth G.